21 REASONS WHY I AM NOT IN PAIN
It's not fair to say ‘mean’ things about people - it’s just my subjective opinion. My parents are great.
My parents did the best they could.
I have a nice house.
I love to party.
I have been in therapy for 6 months, I've done all that work.
I'm a nice person.
I could get hit by a bus tomorrow.
I don't like to dwell on things.
I am not the type of person who feels sorry for herself.
I'm not angry at you.
I hate it when people are angry with me.
Let's change the subject.
When I ______ I will be happy (...fall in love, have a baby, move houses, get a new job…).
Live and learn.
It’s all good.
To each his own.
God doesn’t give us any more than we can handle.
What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.
I am a positive person.
And so on.
Notice the small dissociative jump from the thought/feeling/possibility of pain to each of the statements above. They are jumps, not linear relationships. A reaction to a barely perceived ‘ouch’.
It hurts to live. There is also wonder and joy. When we spend so much of our energy denying our pain we can’t live the wonder and joy either.
Why are we so determined to deny ourselves our birthright?
Our lives are organic, not scripted.
And we hurt. Like hell.
And we love. Like demons.